Trying to get back on track.

It's been so long since I've blogged for myself and I'm totally out of the habit.

This has been our first winter in Texas and it has been a doozy! Have you been watching the weather the past month...it's been insane! We've had far more than our share of ice, sleet and snow. But  this week our temps are back in the 70's and I can feel the call of Spring which is one of my happy seasons.  I took this yesterday...

Blah days make me feel blah. I've realized that I'm GREATLY influenced by my surroundings. I need brightness and happy things around me.

Super awesome tween room

Tea decided she was ready for a room makeover so we are trying to create a fun, cool, artsy, totally Teag room on a budget.

After months of her laboring over the choice of paint we finally ended up with Wild Grape walls. It ended up being the perfect color and she LOVES it. Now we needed something for the windows. Curtains are kinda pricey, especially anything in fun, bright colors and designs. We came up with the idea of using sarongs. While searching for a curtain rod one of my crafty friends suggested a bamboo pole.

It worked perfectly and fits the feel of the room so much better than a formal rod would have.

bamboo pole from Lowe's - under $5
3 sarongs from turtle island imports - $11.95 each (your window size determines how many you need)
and hot pink twine that we already had but I know it's just a few dollars

and here was the result....

Life and Loss

February 26, Saturday. Life was good... great actually. Chris and I went to the Toyota dealership and I came home with my first ever new car. A gorgeous blue Prius!


February 27, Sunday. I called my Dad and my Grandma. Everyone was doing ok. My Gma has been sick for years so she wasn't doing fabulous but she was okay. She was always up and down. She had emphysema and COPD and was on oxygen full time. But we had a good talk and I went on with my day, just like usual.


March 1, Tuesday. An early morning phone call from my Dad, Gma is in a coma.


March 2, Wednesday. Great news! She is awake and talking to everyone. Chris is still at work on the rig until tonight so I feel like I've been given a chance to get there and see her and tell her again, in person, just how much I love her. I call during the day to check in and she is doing really well and still talking. I spend all day preparing for our trip to Florida. Chris is going to get home around 11pm, sleep until 3-4 and we are going to get on the road.


March 3, Thursday. I've fallen asleep waiting for the alarm. The phone rings at 4am. She's gone. I'm in shock. I really thought I was going to get a chance to see her one last time.


It took us 20 hours to get to my grandmother's house. We intended to stay for just a few days and ended up being gone for 10 days. I lost one of the most important people in my life then Chris lost his job, then we had a car accident that trapped us in Louisiana. I feel like things just started spinning out of control with bad news on top of bad news.


Tomorrow is March 17, two weeks since she died and I still feel totally lost without her. Every day of my life I could feel her love. She was my constant. She was always there for me and even when I made stupid choices she loved me. My life just doesn't make sense without her in it and I'm just so sad. I tried to call her at least every two weeks to check in and just blab to her about the mundane details of my life. I still can't quite grasp the fact that I'm never going to speak to her again.

So that's what that feels like

It has been so long since I've been able to craft I think I'd forgotten just how much fun it is to start with an idea, figure out what you are going to try and then working until you end up with a finished product.


This was just a little craft, nothing fancy but it was fun and it filled a need and made my daughter super happy.


Now that she has pierced ears we are quickly collecting teeny little earrings so I was trying to find an easy solution that was a cuter option than the boring plastic things you can buy online.


Supplies


 I cut out the design and then prepared to trace all the pieces


All traced, then you have to cut everything


Lay out and glue


All Done! added ribbons for hanging and for holding the earrings (would work well for hair clips too).

"Me" Time

yea, two entries in a row!


Do you feel like you need time to yourself, away from your family? Some people probably don't and I think that is totally fine because it's right for them.
I've never had much time away and I was always fine with that and actually pretty judgmental about people that were constantly going out or away. 
The kind of Mom I wanted to be was around most often and family came first. And it worked and I still believe that is how it should be when you have little kids.


But my kids are not little anymore, my husband doesn't come home after work every night and I find myself firmly in a rut and increasingly unhappy about not getting more time "off".  I do think even the most dedicated, present parent needs some down time to recharge. If you have great sleepers it could be a few hours of napping a day, or your kids might go off  to school and leave you to your own devices for 6 hours.


I do not fall into those categories. My kids, obviously at 14 and almost 10, do not nap. They do not go to bed early either. They don't pop off to school. They don't even go to any classes or sports unless I take them.


I am ever present... or maybe they are ever present. I guess it depends on who is telling the story. And my husband is gone for at least half the month.


I know that at this point in my life I NEED, notice I did not say want, some time away from the kids, the house, the dogs, etc. I don't often feel like I have any idea how to spend "me' time. I'm painfully dull and practical is some areas so constantly shopping and ignoring the budget isn't an option and neither is just driving around wasting gas. I'm really not a girly girl so the things some of my friends do just do not interest me.


So while I'm not 100% sure how to fill my "free" time, I do know I need to think of a few options. I doubt the budget has the flex room for a deprivation chamber so this is really the easier route.

School's Out For Summer...

And if you are me it's been out for way longer than just the last few weeks/days.


The prep and packing for the move and then the chaos swirl of moving, unpacking, new dog, visiting MIL, working away for weeks husband pretty much adds up to  a big ol homeschooling FAIL  for us.


The kids are doing some basic grammar, math, reading etc. most days but its not consistent and not terribly exciting.


I'm feeling tremendous pressure from myself to get a plan together for this coming year. To see if my slacking has caused them to fall behind in any area. To get my act together. Sadly I just feel completely unable to even figure out a starting point. I have no idea what to do or how I want to do it.


I'm feeling so uninspired with everything. What do you do when you feel like that? How do you figure out a jumping off place to kick start the other ideas?


I'm definitely feeling like a harried homeschooling housewife lately!

A penny for my thoughts

My blog isn't read by thousands or even hundreds... maybe tens on a good day. I doubt my little opinions, thoughts or whines mean much to anyone but it is a place for me to get out the stuff in my head without addressing it to any particular person.


I'm sure by now you have seen footage, read articles  and formed opinions on the situation in the Gulf. It IS horrible, no two ways about it. It is a huge environmental disaster and BP has really seemed to screw up every attempt to solve the problem while not being honest about the severity. The impact of this screw up can't even be fully calculated just yet but it is obviously not good.


I am seeing tons of stop all drilling comments and slogans along similar lines. Screaming for alternative fuels.


I am a big supporter in alternative energy, saving the earth and basically not being a wasteful douche. But here is my irritation.... This isn't just about your car or changing a few lightbulbs. Do you have any idea how many products you use daily that contain some form of petroleum? Here are a few...



Ink, Dishwashing liquids, Paint brushes, Telephones, 


 Toys, Unbreakable dishes, Insecticides, Antiseptics,



 Dolls, Car sound insulation, Fishing lures, Deodorant,


 Tires, Motorcycle helmets, Linoleum, Sweaters,


 Tents, Refrigerator linings, Paint rollers, Floor wax,


 Shoes, Electrician's tape, Plastic wood, Model cars,


Glue, Roller-skate wheels, Trash bags, Soap dishes,


 Skis, Permanent press clothes, Hand lotion, Clothesline,


 Dyes, Soft contact lenses, Shampoo, Panty hose,


 Cameras, Food preservatives, Fishing rods, Oil filters,


 Combs, Transparent tape, Anesthetics, Upholstery,


 Dice, Disposable diapers, TV cabinets, Cassettes,


 Mops, Sports car bodies, Salad bowls, House paint,


 Purses, Electric blankets, Awnings, Ammonia,


 Dresses, Car battery cases, Safety glass, Hair curlers,


 Pajamas, Synthetic rubber, VCR tapes. Eyeglasses,


 Pillows, Vitamin capsules, Movie film, Ice chests,


 Candles, Rubbing alcohol, Loudspeakers, Ice buckets,


 Boats, Ice cube trays, Credit cards, Fertilizers,


 Crayons, Insect repellent, Water pipes, Toilet seats,


 Caulking, Roofing shingles, Fishing boots, Life jackets,


 Balloons, Shower curtains, Garden hose, Golf balls,


 Curtains, Plywood adhesive, Umbrellas, Detergents,


 Milk jugs, Beach umbrellas, Rubber cement, Sun glasses,


 Putty, Faucet washers, Cold cream, Bandages,


 Tool racks, Antihistamines, Hair coloring, Nail polish,


 Slacks, Drinking cups, Guitar strings, False teeth,


 Yarn, Petroleum jelly, Toothpaste, Golf bags,


 Roofing, Tennis rackets, Toothbrushes, Perfume,


 Luggage, Wire insulation, Folding doors, Shoe polish,


 Fan belts, Ballpoint pens, Shower doors, Cortisone,


 Carpeting, Artificial turf, Heart valves, LP records,


 Lipstick, Artificial limbs, Hearing aids, Vaporizers,


 Aspirin, Shaving cream, Wading pools, Parachutes




So, are you totally innocent? I doubt it, no one is. Obviously we should make changes and do what we can but blindly bitching about the evil oil companies and workers makes you look at best shortsighted. We don't want them to drill "here", or "there" but we keep buying stuff and using stuff that requires this material. We create the demand they are filling. And unless you live totally off the grid in a fully sustainable lifestyle, which means you most likely would never see this blog, you are part of that demand.


- Michelle (Venus)
*vegetarian
*eco conscious
*wife of an oil industry worker on a natural gas rig