*deep sigh* The worst is over, I think.
We have moved, it is officially over... all of our stuff is here and we've closed on the house. We need a few big pieces so we can finish unpacking (bookcases, entertainment center, etc).
The house is amazing, which we knew. It is 20 years old so of course it needs some work but we expected that.
Thursday 3/25, My mother in law is flying out for a week so the new routine will have to wait until April 1. I need to get back on track with a lot of things... cooking, blogging, school, crafts. I feel too up in the air with all of this recent upheaval. I need my constants to ground me and make me feel centered. I will get up and clean the kitchen in the morning and that is one of my most zen moments of the day... I want, no, I NEED more of those.
Run, Venus, Run
I love my life. I have an amazing family.
I try very hard to be a good mom. To fulfill all my obligations to the best of my ability. To learn and grow in ways that will make my family and house happier. I'm moving ever closer to a more simple, eco-aware, homesteading kind of life and that is a major goal of mine.
But sometimes, like now, I fantasize about running away. Just for a day... not forever. Just a day of no one else in my head, no thoughts of what anyone needs or mentally mapping where all my little ducks are at the moment.
Just one day, one night of freedom. Of being blissfully selfish.
And while those thoughts are still there under the surface, like a dream. One of my kids will make me laugh so hard that I can't catch my breath. Or do something so sweet and genuine that I can feel my heart actually ache with love for the people they are and I know there is no where else I'd rather be.
Sometimes, being "free" isn't all it's cracked up to be.
I try very hard to be a good mom. To fulfill all my obligations to the best of my ability. To learn and grow in ways that will make my family and house happier. I'm moving ever closer to a more simple, eco-aware, homesteading kind of life and that is a major goal of mine.
But sometimes, like now, I fantasize about running away. Just for a day... not forever. Just a day of no one else in my head, no thoughts of what anyone needs or mentally mapping where all my little ducks are at the moment.
Just one day, one night of freedom. Of being blissfully selfish.
And while those thoughts are still there under the surface, like a dream. One of my kids will make me laugh so hard that I can't catch my breath. Or do something so sweet and genuine that I can feel my heart actually ache with love for the people they are and I know there is no where else I'd rather be.
Sometimes, being "free" isn't all it's cracked up to be.
